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Importance of funeral rites

The Asian identity is largely conservative and superstitious. People tend to shun away the topic of death as it often carries a negative and inauspicious superstition, in fear that talking about such taboo issues would invite bad luck. In a similar vein, just as how important it is to avoid taboo topics in fear of sweeping away “luck”, giving the deceased a proper send-off is of equal or as much importance. Why are funeral rites important?

  1. Traditions and religious beliefs – Honouring ones roots and on the premise that a send-off in a particular fashion would ensure that the deceased can have a smooth sailing and blessed afterlife
  2. Closure – A ceremonial setting where loved ones pay their last respects and offer their condolences are times for the grieving family to better come to fact that their loved one has passed on while gaining solace from others. Some may also say funeral rites are a way of the living “making up” to the dead, for a part of what they were unable to do whilst the deceased was still alive

Living in a cosmopolitan urban jungle like Singapore, it is no surprise that the country is rich in traditions and culture. Unique to each race is its own culture and traditions which makes each unique. Singapore is also a city-state known for its rich religious diversity – to name a few such as the likes of Taoism, Hinduism, Islam, Christianity and not forgetting Buddhism. These differences in spiritual beliefs and the offering practices of each race thus makes the planning and execution of funeral rites in Singapore vastly different, with each of these unique groups adopting various funeral practices.

Must-knows

Unlucky numbers

Some numbers are lucky; eight is one of them, and eighth-floor apartments in China have been known to fetch a higher market price accordingly. But the number four is considered unlucky because it sounds a lot like the word for “death,” and as a result Chinese buildings often lack a fourth floor (just as American buildings sometimes skip the 13th).
Avoid unlucky number 13
From Friday the 13th to the number of the Beast to the unlucky number four, digit-related superstitions are aplenty. Whether you have triskaidekaphobia or just want to play things safe, you tend to find yourself avoiding all things 13. Around the world including Singapore, the double-digit is synonymous with bad luck, which is one of the reasons many companies such as hotels use another way of numbering or labelling to avoid the number. Many people also hesitate at the idea of staying on the 13th floor. The number four, on the other hand, is considered unlucky as it sounds a lot like “death” in Mandarin.
In Chinese beliefs, even numbers are associated with auspicious events and items. As funeral is not considered an auspicious event, a wake is held over an odd number of days, such as 3, 5 or 7. Condolence donations, commonly known as pek kim, or bai jin, are also given in odd configurations. A minimum sum of $30 is quite common the minimum amount to be offered in Singapore. More can be donated depending on a visitor’s financial situation and degree of closeness to the family. These donations are called bai jin because they are offered to the family in white envelopes and are typically used to help the family offset funereal expenses as these affairs can be rather costly.

What to wear?

You have to dress modestly so that you will not disrespect the family of the deceased and their feelings. When you are trying to finalize your funeral dress and considering what to wear you basically want to be respectful and modest towards the family of the deceased.
Below are some of the tips that will help you to finalize your outfit for such an occasion:

  • Try to wear dull colours (black, dark green, white)
  • Try to wear simple accessories
  • Your patterns should be simple
  • Don’t choose something that is too casual

Burial or Cremation?

In Singapore, 82% of all deaths are cremated. 73% are cremated at government-owned Mandai Crematorium and 9% at privately owned crematoria (Kong Meng San Phor Kark See Monastery and Tse Toh Aum Temple).

 
Burial
Cremation
Cost
Cost for burials:

  • $315 for Muslim, Ahmadiyya Jama’at, Jewish, Parsi and Bahai cemetery plots
  • $940 for all other cemetery plots (e.g. Christian, Chinese, Hindu)



Aside from storing the ashes in a columbarium or land burial, you may also choose to scatter the ashes in the sea. An area 2.8km south of Pulau Semakau between 7am and 7pm is set aside for sea burial. You or your funeral director can contact MPA’s Port Marine Safety Control Centre at 6325 2488 for more details.


Burials in Singapore are limited to only 15 years, leading to the local preference for cremation. After 15 years, the remains are exhumed and cremated, unless there are compulsory religious reasons that prohibits this. In which case, the remains are exhumed and reburied in smaller plots. Choa Chu Kang Cemetery is the only cemetery that allows for burials.

Cost for cremation:

  • Mandai Crematorium: $100 (cremation only), $500 (standard niche), $900 (family niche)
  • Kong Meng San Phor Kark See Monastery: $300 (cremation only), $400 (cremation + urn storage)
  • Tse Toh Aum Temple: $400 (cremation only), $500 (cremation + urn storage)



Additional charges will apply for selection of niches and choice of urns.


Private columbarium niches typically charge around $2,000 to $3,000. A typical standard marble urn would cost $350 onwards. A marble plaque with inscription would start at $1,000, while there are cheaper alternatives such as quartz. These charges are usually not covered under funeral packages. The cost also varies from columbariums based on the preferred suppliers and niche sizes.

Funeral Venues

Venue Type
Details
HDB Void Deck
Requires a permit from the Town Council. Applicants must be:

  • over 21 years old
  • a relative of the deceased
  • a HDB resident of the Town Council that they’re applying to.

The Town Council will then advise on the available HDB common spaces nearest the block of residence and charges for utilities (water and electricity).
HDB provides temporary parking for bereaved family members, and this can be obtained from any HDB Branch/Service Centre.

HDB provides temporary parking for bereaved family members, and this can be obtained from any HDB Branch/Service Centre.

Private Apartment Grounds
Family members need to get permission from the condo management, which is highly dependent on the condo management and facilities.
Alternatively, family members can consider using state land near the apartment for the funeral wake. As such, they will have to apply for a Temporary Occupation Licence (TOL) from the Singapore Land Authority (SLA). Booking charges will apply, depending on the amount of land space needed.

Landed Property
Bereaved family members can hold the funeral wake in their own house. Should they need to use part of the road outside their landed property or any public roads for a funeral procession, they will need a permit from the Singapore Police Force (SPF).
Funeral Parlour
While the packages for funeral parlours are more expensive upfront, the location is secure at night and family members need not stay overnight. Not only do you minimise the physical and emotional toil of staying overnight at the wake, family members also avoid the additional charges of having a night “watchman” to oversee the wake at night if the family is unable to do so.

If the funeral wake extends to more than 7 days after death, prior written permission must be obtained from the National Environment Agency (NEA).

Visitation

In traditional Chinese wakes, family members would keep all-night vigils by the coffin, and visitors could play mahjong with the family to keep themselves occupied. Today, funeral parlours offer lock-up security, and families do not see the need to engage in this practice strictly.

Condolence Flowers

For funerals in Singapore, it is essential to observe the sending of appropriate condolences flowers. The safest and most widely accepted are condolences wreaths to symbolise the eternity of life. Flowers help create an environment filled with peace and solemnity as well as comfort to the mourning family. It is important to choose the right type of flowers with the right colours. Different flower colours offer different meanings and symbolism depending on the tradition, beliefs and religion.

Flower Colours
Meaning
White
The traditional colour of flowers for funerals are white. It symbolizes deep emptions and sentiments for those who grieve over the death of their loved ones. White funeral flowers symbolizes innocence, honour, purity and spirituality. Most common types of white flowers and Peace Lily, rose, carnations and orchids
Yellow
Yellow flowers are also a great option. In the modern generation, there is nothing wrong with yellow flowers. Yellow is a symbol of respect and gratitude as well as beauty and strength. It has the ability to uplift moods, soothe the pained soul and adds brightness to a tribute. This is mostly for people who have strong friendships with the deceased.
Pink
Pink flower arrangements are a perfect choice is the funeral service is intended for a female. Pink is a symbol of grace, beauty and feminity. Roses, carnations, lilies and orchids are a great choice in conveying condolences to the family.
Flower Types
Meaning
Lilies
As one of the most popular floral choices for funerals, lilies represent the restored innocence of the soul of the departed.
Carnations
White carnations convey pure love and innocence; red carnations represent admiration; and pink carnations stand for remembrance.
Chrysanthemums
In many European cultures, chrysanthemums are only used as funeral flowers as they are symbolic of death. In the US, chrysanthemums represent truth and are typically regarded as a cheerful way to honour someone who lived a full life.
Roses
This highly popular flower carries different meanings depending on the colour:
White roses express reverence, innocence and youthfulness
Red roses convey respect, love and courage
Pink roses signify love, grace and gentility
Crimson roses denote grief and sorrow
Yellow represents friendship.
Orchids
Pink and white are traditional orchid colors used to express one’s sympathy and typically represent eternal love. Phalaenopsis and dendrobium orchids are generally the most appropriate types of orchids used as sympathy flowers.

Rituals and customs

  • In Chinese societies, the rites and rituals at the funeral are taken very seriously and these customs have an important value in Chinese culture. It is believed that if the customs are not followed or the arrangements were not according to the standards of Chinese traditions than this may lead to inviting bad luck for the family members of the deceased. The incomplete arrangement can bring disaster to the deceased house where his family members are living.
  • The mourning and rituals are performed up to 100 days after the day of the death. It is believed that the soul of the deceased visits his house on the 7th day after his death. On the 7th day, it is necessary that all the family members should be at home in their rooms and there should be powder at the entrance of the room. To end the mourning period a prayer ceremony is held after the 100 days of the death. The mourning is prayers are kept for 100 days as it is considered that in this time the soul of the deceased is reborn as another human.
  • Unique to each race is its own culture and traditions which makes each funeral procession unique. Spiritual beliefs and offering practices of each race thus makes the planning and execution of funeral rites in Singapore vastly different.
  • The 7 main religions and funeral processions
Christianity
  1. The service is usually carried out at a church, crematorium or cemetery and will include prayers, a sermon, readings, hymns and sometimes music or poems
  2. Typically, an eulogy is also delivered by a loved one to reminisce the times spent with the deceased
  3. The pastor usually shares a word from the bible and engages the present in prayers to send off the dead while offering comfort and support for mourners
Catholicism
  1. In a Catholic funeral, the family traditionally holds a wake for the deceased person for 3 to 7 days to allow other family and relatives to come and pay their last respect before interment. It is a customary tradition and belief that the wake should last for 3, 5, or 7 days. An odd number is significant for grief for the Chinese-Catholic.
  2. Visitors will be given a red thread that they can wear around the finger. After leaving the wake, visitors will let the red thread slip off the finger before they reach their house.
Buddhism
  1. Buddhist monks are expected to perform chanting on the wake and on the last night of the funeral wake. Aside from the white Buddhist funeral flowers, family, relatives, and friends may also bring food and fruit offerings for the deceased. Other common and traditional funeral necessities are joss sticks, joss stick urn, lotus candles, joss paper sandalwood, and sandalwood powder.
  2. At the wake, a bucket of water containing fresh flowers is prepared to be used for cleansing. It has been believed that the water can cleanse away negativity brought by the funeral to the visitors. Red thread is also used to ensure safety and protection from evil spirits.
  3. Visitors are required to wear white t-shirts as mourning clothes on the day of funerals.
Taoism
  1. The most common trends in Taoist funerals include the funeral rites being performed by the Taoist Priest.
  2. In a Taoist funeral wake, the funeral director is assigned to provide all the necessary funeral services because the family of the deceased person is beset by grief and sorrow. There may be various Taoist denominations with different rites and rituals for the funerals, there are also some common funeral rites.
  3. Based on traditions and belief, the funeral wake lasts for 3, 5, or 7 days. An altar is set up with a lamp on top to signify sacredness and immortality. There are 2 large candles on the table together with some cups filled with tea, water, and rice. They also have 5 plates of fruits to signify the 5 elements. In the center of the table, an incense burner is set up.
Islam
  1. The rites are followed in accordance with their religious laws or commonly known as Syariah. It is important and traditional for them to handle the body with the utmost care.
  2. Part of the Islamic traditional funeral rituals is the washing and shrouding of the body of the deceased person. This procedure is called a ghusl. According to Muslim law and religion, this procedure is done by the family member or by someone of the same gender. The body is washed with water three times to ensure that the body is clean. This is followed by kafan, the shrouding of the body. It is the wrapping of the body in plain white cloth coated with camphor, non-alcoholic perfume, and sandalwood powder. This is not just a ritual but a significance of dignity and privacy of the deceased person.
  3. The next part of the Islamic funeral rituals is the funeral prayer. The congregation performs the prayer for the deceased person, and this is called jenazah. The funeral traditions of jenazah should be performed at home of the family or at their mosque. It is led by Imam while facing Qiblat or the direction of Mecca. An immediate family gets Muslim funeral flowers.
  4. The last part of the funeral rituals is the burial. In Islamic burial, the body is placed in a coffin and brought to the cemetery. To bury the body, it is gently lowered in the grave without the coffin. The body is facing Qiblat. The grave is, then, covered fully with soil. To end the funeral rituals, a funeral sermon is said at the grave.
Hinduism
  1. Depending on sects and sub-sects, the Hinduism funeral rituals vary in practices and procedures. It is a tradition for the people in Hindu faith to die at home surrounded by the family. A prayer vigil is performed until the time of death. Hindu mourners use Hindu funeral flowers to adorn the body and to prepare for the cremation.
  2. In Hindu funeral traditions, the body of the deceased person remains at home for 24 hours, and after this, cremation is performed. They scatter the ashes on water. It could be a sacred body of water or one that is important and significant to the deceased person.
  3. At the funeral wake, mourners wear an appropriate dress, and the chief mourner leads them. White clothes are appropriate and black is not accepted. Visitors are expected to attend the special funeral ceremony 10 days after to liberate and free the soul of the deceased person. They can bring fruits to the ceremony.
Sikhism
  1. The Sikh beliefs on death and funeral are distinct. They believe that the soul never dies but reunited to their God, Waheguru the Wondrous Giver of Knowledge.
  2. In Antam Sanskaar, the Sikh funeral, the funeral ceremony is focused on the celebration of life, not on loss, as the soul reunites with Waheguru.
  3. Immediately after the death, Sikh funeral traditions begin by bathing the body and dressing it in clean, decent clothes. If the deceased person is Amrithdhari Sikh, the Kakaars or the articles of Sikh faith worn by the person should not be taken off from the body.
  4. The family may opt for an open casket to allow family and relatives to see the person before the burial. The family may also have the body surrounded and adorned with Sikh funeral flowers.
  5. Funeral rites and traditions in these ethnic groups are strictly adhered to and followed in order to bring rest and peace to the soul of the deceased person. These rites are expected to be observed carefully up to the last detail no matter the religion, beliefs, and ethnicity the family belongs. Respect is given to the deceased person, as well as to the bereaved family.

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